Shoulder Vultures

 Yep, something to go along with yesterday's post. Anyone suffer from shoulder vultures? 

For us writers, they says things like, "No one wants to read anything you write." Or, "You're the worst writer, ever."  Or, "You have nothing of interest to be blogging about."

For some, it's a lack of self-confidence. Maybe it's the fear we can't live up to the expectations of others. Or, we put so much pressure on ourselves, it's easier to not do things that challenge us.

Years ago, a lot of them, I took an online writing course. I sent in my first assignment and eagerly awaited the day it would return with comments from my instructor. At least, I waited eagerly until it came in the mail and I had it in hand. Then, I sat on my bed and stared at it for a couple hours before daring to open it. Her comments were much better than I thought they'd be and I felt silly for not opening the assignment sooner.

This online school had a chat room. Like I said, this was a LONG time ago. Chat rooms were a great way to meet people and socialize without leaving your house. In this chat room, I met another instructor who explained about shoulder vultures. 

Shoulder vultures are sneaky. They show up when you least expect them and they whisper just the right things to make you question everything. They aren't pleasant.

But, you can get rid of them. At least temporarily. For me, I kept copies of critiques with all the positive comments highlighted. After a while, I kept rejection letters that encouraged me with an "almost, but not quite, try again with something else" comment. Then I added acceptance letters and emails from contests I'd won. And when one of those shoulder vultures showed up, I'll pull out my pile of encouragement and show them that, yes, I'm a darn good writer. They'd squawk a bit and leave.

So, here's the thing. We are all going to have doubts. Some days are going to suck. And, that's okay. 

My daughter and I are members at the same gym and we both have personal trainers. Which I highly recommend. Her trainer is the male version of Jillian Michaels but we both really enjoy him. He tells her that yes, it's hard, it's gonna be sore, and sometimes it's just going to plain suck. He says for her to embrace the suck and move forward. And that's good advice for all of us. 

So, I leave you with this thought. Have you ever noticed how one negative comment or criticism can wipe out and make us forget the 99 positive ones? Writers are really bad about this. We get one negative review and we focus on it instead of the 99 good ones. Let's be more mindful of the good ones.